Friday, November 23, 2007

Conferences and Stuff Happening In 3's

Friday was a big day as I knew it would be:

1) Leo's Parent/Teacher Conference
2) My Grandmother passing
3) Left my children with family for our first weekend alone in 9 years (Leo is 9).

Shockingly, our conference didn't bring up any deficit that required services. Hurray! I was relieved that my husband was able to make the meeting so he could repeat what he heard which did match what I heard. I wanted to be sure I interpreted the situation accurately, and since I knew I'd be freaking out inside, I may miss something. As we know, 3rd grade is the big marker year, testing begins and this is when residual issues can come up. I've seen his marks so far and his report card. A solid B student. We'll see what happens after she knows him better and what happens after standardized testing and the end of the year. Then for sure I can be relieved. Or will I ever? I don't know.

Leo's teacher seemed to really enjoy him, and said he was a very enthusiastic learner, and gives it his all. He participates most of the time, and seems to be in a good mood all of the time. She said he's always willing to help and is very respective and considerate of his peers. She also said he is someone other kids seek out as a friend. Of course, that one got both of us teary. I asked about the talking-out-of-turn, and she said he "needs to raise his hand more often", but didn't seem concerned about it. When I asked more about it, she seemed confused, so of course I changed the subject. Obviously not a disruption or a major issue. Something to work on for sure, but not as it once was. She said all the right things, "He's a sweet boy, you must work very hard as parents. Good for you.", and of course I wonder if she says that to everyone to relieve stress. Who knows. Either way, I am happy Leo continues to blossom and not need any modifications. I am beyond grateful and amazed by him.

As I was getting ready for our big weekend, I found out my sweet grandmother finally passed away. We knew it was coming, she had been in the hospital and a home for a while now. It was a perfect ending to an incredible life. She died naturally at 96, with family around her, in a quiet environment with material comforts and things that were familiar to her like pictures. I really feel for my mom, and am relieved for her that she can recover from her loss.

My SIL and MIL offered a while ago to tag team for one weekend this fall, and so we finally did it. Yay! The kids did GREAT, even when my daughter had a fever the night before that broke and a cold while we were away. I am so grateful that we can actually leave them - they are old enough to stay without us, not in their house. Leo is no longer hypoglycemic, and can basically eat anything with no consequence, although an enzyme and no gluten is preferred. The days of constant stimming have been long gone, but a toddler with a "high-maintenance" older brother kept us home. The food/supplement stuff was too challenging until recently. A couple days on a skeleton program was just fine. The days are gone when one bite of a muffin would send Leo into a catatonic-like fog. Living by the clock with food is also gone, so leaving them in the hands of my inlaws was a reality. Everyone had a great time and for sure we'll do it again. I can't believev it's been 9 years! I am grateful though, many Autism families can NEVER leave their kids. I have a friend with a son with diabetes - you thought Autism was a lot of work, man! So, we were grateful to not worry and not worrying meant we could really relax and have fun. It was like a super date!

7 comments:

Artemisia said...

First, I'm so sorry about your grandmother. It's good to know you have the great aging genes, though. I hope to be around at 96, myself.

"he is someone other kids seek out as a friend." Oh, god, this makes me tear up, too! What a great, great testiment to success. My pedi (who also has a child on the spectrum) always asked about how the other kids reacted to Boo in preschool and early grades - he felt that so much of his future could be measured from their instincts (not to minimize the role of the school in keeping things civil but I think he had something there). The academic stuff is great, but the potential thinness of relationships and friendships is what scared me most about autism.

Ashley loves Leo said...

Thanks Artemisia! Well, I'm adopted so there goes the gene hypothesis! ha ha And we already know how "great" my genes are! :)

That so fascinating about your ped's philosophy - it makes sense. Kids have that instinct we adults lose. That is my greatest fear as well. At least I know he'll always have that with his family.

I'm so jealous that you have a ped with a child on the spectrum! How long have you had this doctor? I can only dream....

Ashley loves Leo said...

Thanks Artemisia! Well, I'm adopted so there goes the gene hypothesis! ha ha And we already know how "great" my genes are! :)

That so fascinating about your ped's philosophy - it makes sense. Kids have that instinct we adults lose. That is my greatest fear as well. At least I know he'll always have that with his family.

I'm so jealous that you have a ped with a child on the spectrum! How long have you had this doctor? I can only dream....

Maddy said...

We do have access to baby sitters [respite] but we've never left them for the night [obviously] I'm amazed and delighted to hear that you don't qualify for services any more!
Cheers

Ashley loves Leo said...

That's wonderful you have babysitters! Hurray for that! Yeah, with two, how could you possibly do it. I hope one day you can have a night - maybe your older daughter in the U.K. can be up to the challenge!

Anonymous said...

I really wonder what you would be like if your son hadn't "recovered." God help him if he hadn't. It sounds like you'd be one miserable person who would have never accepted him at all.

Ashley loves Leo said...

Wow, a bit out of the loop Anon? It sounds like you haven't read any of our story. It's on my main website at hiddenrecovery.com. I'd also take a look at previous posts here.

I appreciate all of your "compassion" and "empathy" for a fellow parent.